I was born in 1966, and my father left when I was 3 (no, not because he went to Woodstock). He decided to live his authentic life as a gay man and my parents divorced. Then he died in 1979. Being an only child with an emotionally damaged mother led to extreme isolation. I was the only kid in school with no father. I didn’t realize how low my self-esteem was until I was older. I would sometimes imagine he wasn’t really dead, that it was a mistake. And I struggled with how I felt about him. Did I love him? Did I hate him? It didn’t matter, I just wanted a Dad. There was always a hole in my heart, but in spite of the odds being against me, I made a family with a wonderful husband and five amazing children. We settled in Pennsylvania in 2015 to live a quiet life………Um, about that….
A few years ago, everything was a mess—the basement was flooding, my appliances were wonky and I was having dizzy spells that would not go away. I realized that my mediumship skills had kicked in and that my father is around. LITERALLY. Everything that I missed out on as a child has come to me in my 50s. And that’s super weird so I decided to write about it because I’ve gotten a second chance with my Dad. And he’s pretty cool.