Trust Me

As a longtime friend of my two protagonists, I move freely and impartially in their personal environment. I observed with great interest how the relationship of the two both appeared and developed over time. In the winter 2018, I was suddenly confronted with their changed situation that had resulted from Sebastian's expression of desire. From intense conversations with them about their values, certainties, hopes and fears sprang my desire to document their changing relationship and to make a film about the cultural traditions, concepts, problems - and possibilities - of any couple‘s relationship in today's world.
My first approaches with the camera motivated both me and the protagonists to invest work and time in this project. Alicja was immediately able, Sebastian after a very short habituation phase, to accept and also forget me and the camera as witness. The results of the first days together show an extraordinary naturalness in the behavior of the two in front of the camera.
Presenting one's own circumstances to a more or less large public is no longer anything fundamentally special at a time when people are constantly presenting themselves via social media. The walls that protected the private sphere not long ago, behind which people hid problems and flaws, are becoming increasingly transparent. But self-portrayal usually takes place in a controlled form. The actor himself determines how he or she is seen from the outside and does not necessarily show himself or herself in an authentic way. By contrast, Alicja and Sebastian simply ‘leave the door ajar’ whenever they are ready to share. Just as in their relationship itself, creating this film is about
openness and truthfulness. This surprised me again and again, and the same applies to most of the people who have been confronted with their story so far.
Thousands of couples every day look for fulfillment in other ways. About half of European adults cheat in their relationship. Infidelity is the most common reason for divorce. Jealousy is the main cause of fatal acts of violence in Western countries. More than half of husbands and wives admit that they do not find their sexual desires fulfilled with their partner. The default mode in married relationships is lie, cheat, hurt, break up.
An alternative is to open oneself up to a whole new extent. This often includes the disclosure of intimate longings and desires. A disclosure of such desires, however, usually entails a discussion of the possibilities of their fulfilment. The basic concept of my protagonists' relationship is the unadorned.
The film shows presents the disclosure of all such thoughts. My film is intended to make this disclosure and the resulting consequences tangible for the viewer. The idea is that the viewer should experience and feel what happens when even the ultimate questions are asked and answered as openly as possible.
The prurience with which the topic of opening a partnership is treated in a superficial public discussion obscures the difficult and, certainly in most cases, painful process of starting a new culture of sharing in relationships. It is precisely with this process that I wish to confront the viewer.
What does it mean to have a long-term stable relationship in a world where everything we desire seems to be readily available and in which we have access to hundreds of potential new partners? In which, if things are no longer going well in the existing relationship, we can select and contact someone new at any time with the help of our smartphones?
We are observing a new social phenomenon: the search for new rules and perhaps also for a new morality. This is not, however, how we are brought up and prepared for life in Poland. Every fairy tale about a princess, romantic movies and relationships that surround us, reinforce a belief that happiness in love is a one-to-one arrangement. Our grandmothers, aunts and mothers teach us partnership in this way. Church and society forbid other solutions. Is it possible to cast off these roots and program yourself for an alternative approach? If so, what is the human cost of this transformation and what remains of the bonds of love after we destroy the foundations we know?
Alicja and Sebastian experience a crisis at a point familiar to many in their own relationship. The point where cracks appear on a formerly smooth surface, where questions are asked to which there are no easy answers. We don't know where the protagonists will lead us. Alicja and Sebastian begin a new chapter in their lives as a couple, leaving the door open for us to see the most personal, hidden aspects of their characters. Anything can happen, just like in any other relationship at any time.