SHADOW

I first got the idea for this film while researching the Romanian Legend of the Arges Monastery for a full evening length show I created in 2018. In the legend, a pregnant woman is immured to make the walls of the monastery stand. After further research, I came across the belief of the “stahie,” or shadow, an ancient Eastern European belief and practice that in order for the walls of a building to stand, someone has to be built into the walls either physically (i.e their body), or metaphysically (i.e their shadow). 
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As I delved into the legend and this belief, I found myself facing my many shadows - my many possibilities and my many fears. I found myself questioning: Who is the shadow? What reality/possibility do I choose? Does it even matter, if we all fade away from memory and existence, leaving nothing behind?  

Ultimately, I was questioning whether, as a woman, it was more important for me to create, or to reproduce. And, why do I have this need? Is it to achieve a sort of immortality, a way to exist beyond my existence, whether through the creation of offspring, or art creation? The shadows represent my personal struggle of what realities/possibilities to choose as a woman artist - art creation vs. procreation. 

Besides the central theme being a female dilemma, this film is female created (directed, composed, performed, and edited by women).