WHINE

LOGLINE
Wannabe vino virtuoso pitches billionaire Reality T.V. tycoons with the goal of joining them at their table of riches.

SYNOPSIS
Marty Jamieson pitches five billionaire tycoons on the hit reality show, SNAKE PIT, asking for $1 million in exchange for a 10 percent equity stake in his Holy Grail Wine Company. Marty needs the investment to add an additional bottling line to meet demand. Marty claims he’s selling the ONLY VESSEL IN AMERICA which allows you to have Premium Vino on the go. Marty expresses his ultimate goal is becoming a Snake in The Snake Pit.

Snake, Kenneth O’Shady, a.k.a., the snobbiest wine snob of all the tycoons, asks Marty if he’s selling a packaging system or wanting to get into the over-saturated wine business? The other Snakes are also more interested in Marty’s packaging patent than the wine brand. O’Shady senses déjà vu with Marty but he doesn’t recall crossing paths prior to now.

Marty requests a break. He calls his former prostitute girlfriend, Camila Polvay, and whines about what he should do since they don’t own the packaging rights. Camila earlier had told him, “Don’t WHINE, just SELL. THE. WINE!” She advises him to “CHANNEL (his) INNER SNAKE” and bullshit the Snakes.

Marty leaves the show without a deal, but the office phones blow up with orders as a result of his show appearance. Sales skyrocket and Snake Pit producers invite Marty to appear on the show a second time.

Marty and Camila pitch the Snakes and again no deal is reached. Competitor Russell Anderson from Screw-Off Wine Co. follows with his pitch. Russell reveals during his pitch how Marty’s two pitches were full of lies, fabrications and fictionalizations.

O’Shady agrees to invest $10 million in Screw Off Wine but Russell Anderson must get production down to $1.25 a serving before O’Shady pitches Costco. O’Shady wants to wreck smartass Marty Jamieson and bury Holy Grail.

Marty and Camila meet with their advisors to discuss the latest problems facing Holy Grail Wine including: fraud accusations, tax evasion allegations, distributor Ponzi schemes and licensing lawsuits. Kenneth O’Shady is the prime suspect to Holy Grail Wine’s latest headaches.

Marty and Camila drink wine on their porch, discuss the future and the possibility of getting out of the wine business. Camila challenges Marty not to rule out a miracle with Divine Intervention.

Marty and Camila review Chapter 11 Bankruptcy reorganizing documents prior to signing. Before they sign, Cardinal Leonardo Sunday calls from the Vatican. Cardinal Sunday indicates the Pope is a Big Fan of Marty’s and wants to wire a deposit of $20 million on the Vatican’s first order of Holy Grail Wine.

They decide not to go forward with the bankruptcy. Screw-Off Wine implodes resulting in O’Shady’s fatal cardiac.