Private Project

Not Forgiven

A son comes to speak to his mother. He is going to serve in the army. He asks his mother to write letters to him, while he is at the service. However, he faces refusal from his mother because she doesn't accept that he is gay.

  • Ayken Kuatbayeva
  • Ayken Kuatbayeva
  • Ayken Kuatbayeva
  • Dmitriy Kondrashov
    Key Cast
  • Mariya Romanova
    Key Cast
  • Project Title (Original Language):
  • Project Type:
  • Runtime:
    5 minutes 9 seconds
  • Completion Date:
    June 4, 2021
  • Production Budget:
    10,000 USD
  • Country of Origin:
    Russian Federation
  • Country of Filming:
    Russian Federation
  • Language:
  • Shooting Format:
  • Aspect Ratio:
  • Film Color:
  • First-time Filmmaker:
  • Student Project:
Director Biography - Ayken Kuatbayeva

I am a first-time female filmmaker. I have studied at the Script writing lab by Alexander Mitta in 2013. I have studied at the New York Film Academy in Moscow in 2012 with my mentor being Paul Brown, also scriptwriting. I have studied Script writing at the lab of Alexander Molchanov from 2016-2019. I have always worked on a film set either as music producer or script-doctor and this is my debut short film. I have been married to a man, who is gay, for 18 years as I have been his wife and only last year of 2020, I have decided to divorce him and start my own life as an artistic person. I have also written a fiction work of art: "The Hero of My Novel" in Russian language that has been a bestseller in Russia in 2017 and it is also on the topic of being married to a gay person. I hope to live through my life experience of living with a gay person through this film "UnFORGIVEN". I didn't have physical contact for all 18 years of marriage with my husband. I have gone through all stages of his nonacceptance of being gay, acceptance of being gay, hiding that he is gay by marrying me, living together with me for over 10 years since we got married and finally he was able to accept that he is gay (Full circle of character development my husband Igor has gone through while I was by his side). At that moment, he moved to Brazil after 10 years of our marriage and left me behind. I have been waiting for him all those years and now in 2020, I realised that I am ready to start my own life. 2021 started for me as being without my gay husband, who became a musician, who was hiding his gay identity as editor-in-chief of the most prominent magazine "OM" in Russia. Hiding is no longer needed for anyone because the time has changed. Now being LGBTQ+ is discussed among very young people and orientation can be freely discussed in the most conservative societies of our world because young people don't fear being different anymore. I would also be happy to live my own life as a plus (loving all humanity) and I have made this film for people to accept their identity and "die with nonacceptance of their parents as male lead of my film does" and revive in real life as you are gay, lesbian, bisexual, queer, transgender or plus. We only have one life. We are ought to accept ourselves as we are: gay or lesbian or just LGBTQ+ supportive. Igor Grigoriyev was into writing business - he released the most popular magazine "OM" in Russian Federation during all years of our marriage, I have been able to heal him with music from society nonacceptance of his as I have instrumental music background and I have been healed from societal nonacceptance with his art of writing, script writing and creative writing as well.

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Director Statement

Before leaving for the army, the young man comes to his Mother to say goodbye and asks her to write him sometimes. She refuses. A Mother cannot accept that her son is gay. A month later, she receives a funeral note.