Judas and the God of Nihility

If a person is forced to make a decision, it means that he is probably miserable.
This person can't make a decision, he is still swaying in the daily numbness.
However, he recently remembered something from the past, had a dream and heard some absurd stories.
The change happened, but he did nothing, except what he remembered, except for anxiety and panic.
Judah regretted selling Jesus for thirty silver coins, and he committed suicide for redemption.
And this person abandoned himself for the sake of atonement.