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I Chose Life

Jacqui Blue tackles the subject of suicide in this important documentary with the help of Jared Padalecki (Supernatural), T.O.N.E-z (Justified), Kevin Briggs ("Guardian of the Golden Gate Bridge") and the stars of The Last Train: Anthony Montes & Ciera Danielle.

This groundbreaking documentary is more than just a film about suicide and suicide survivors, but because this film covers what suicide is, what it looks like, warning signs, risk factors and included solutions, I Chose Life: Stories of Suicide and Survival becomes a powerful tool and resource intended to actually help people who watch it.

  • Jacqui Blue
    Director
    Beautiful Births, Burden of Proof, Love and Other Lies, Sed
  • Jacqui Blue
    Writer
    Beautiful Births, Love and Other Lies
  • Jacqui Blue
    Producer
    Beautiful Births, Burden of Proof, Love and Other Lies,
  • Jessica Fondo
    Producer
    Beautiful Births
  • Marilyn Fondo
    Producer
  • Jeanne Finkelstein
    Producer
  • Jared Padalecki
    Key Cast
    "Himself"
    Supernatural, Gilmore Girls, Friday the 13th, House of Wax
  • T.O.N.E-z
    Key Cast
    "Himself"
    Justified, Sed, Frances Stein
  • Kevin Briggs
    Key Cast
    "Himself"
    The Remarkable Ones
  • Joe Tabbanella (aka Joe Tabb)
    Key Cast
    "Himself"
    Melrose Place, NCIS, The Young & The Restless, Desire, Saints & Sinners
  • Anthony Montes
    Key Cast
    "Himself"
    The Last Train, The Last Night Inn, Matlock
  • Ciera Danielle
    Key Cast
    "Herself"
    The Last Train, Daisy's, The Last Night Inn
  • Amanda Jones
    Key Cast
    "Herself"
  • Charity Jones
    Key Cast
    "Herself"
    The Last Train
  • Bruce Witkin
    Composer
    Jimmy the Saint, Rum Diary, Once Upon a Time in Mexico
  • Lisa Parrott-Perz ("Coma Girl")
    Graphic Artist
  • Project Type:
    Documentary
  • Genres:
    Drama, Social Issues
  • Runtime:
    1 hour 34 minutes 51 seconds
  • Completion Date:
    July 22, 2019
  • Country of Origin:
    United States
  • Country of Filming:
    United States
  • Language:
    English
  • Shooting Format:
    Digital
  • Aspect Ratio:
    16:9
  • Film Color:
    Color
  • First-time Filmmaker:
    No
  • Student Project:
    No
Director Biography - Jacqui Blue

Jacqui Blue put herself back through school twice after leaving a toxic relationship that nearly left her dead in 2011 and decided that life was too short not to pursue her dreams. She holds an A.S. in video production and is a certified hypnotherapist with a lifetime background in theater and writing. She worked at the Florida Media Market while in film school and after the completion of her first documentary, launched her production company, Starseed Pictures.

After achieving international acclaim with her first film, Beautiful Births, Jacqui was one of 10 Directors selected by James Franco for his Master Class, "Sex Scenes". She went on to work with Jared Padalecki & T.O.N.E-z in her suicide awareness documentary and appears on-screen next to Lou Diamond Phillips in The Last Train. T.O.N.E-z hired her to co-write, direct and edit a passion project of his, a vampire noir, called Sed. She's now working on a few other high concept documentary subjects, her first feature narrative film and a book.

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Director Statement

Ciera and Anthony knew my previous work in documentary film (Beautiful Births) and approached me about making a documentary on the making of their film, The Last Train. The idea snowballed into making a full on documentary on the topic of suicide awareness. As the step-daughter of a Vietnam veteran and domestic abuse survivor who has dealt with my own bouts of depression, suicide ideation and even attempts when I was younger, this is a subject that I know well first hand.

I began this journey in March 2015 and started talking to people who lost family members to suicide. Over the last few years I talked to mothers, fathers, daughters, sisters and every story was different but all were heartbreaking. Months later I couldn’t get their stories out of my head. Some of them became social media acquaintances who gave a me a peek into their lives. Suddenly it became very clear to me that this film wasn’t just my film. This film was their film. This film was their lost loved one’s film. This was a conversation that needed to happen. I heard about suicide from those who were eager to commit the act to those who were devastated because someone in their life had.

This wasn’t my time to speak, have an opinion, question, judge, offer advice, solace - it was my time to shut up and listen. So I did. Then I read articles, journals and books and watched films on suicide cults (Jonestown and Heaven’s Gate) and The Bridge. I spent the last few years researching the subject of suicide from all angles including as far back into our human history as I could find of accounts of people taking their own lives. I followed the trail to our present day crisis with statistics around the world.

Always an optimist at heart and aware of how heavy this subject is, I wanted to end with a message of hope and suggest alternative coping mechanisms - which is really what people who are suffering with suicide ideation are in need of. People take their lives when their coping mechanisms are gone. Chemical medication works for only a percentage of the population, so for those whom it doesn’t work on, we discuss a new study that UCLA is doing to rearrange the brain circuits, Jared Padalecki talks about how he learned how to re-train his neurons. We discuss diet and the importance of nutrition, art therapy and its many benefits.

Our country is facing many crisis’ right now. Suicide is one of them but it’s also part of a bigger issue; mental health - which is plaguing our country right now. We need major mental health reform and it is my hope that this film will get some real solution-based conversations started on that topic. Not only is this film important but it’s never been more relevant and timely then it is right now.

This film is a labor of love with no real budget and I’ve once again had to utilize my available resources to get it made but it’s full of heart, soul, tears and hope. Where I lack in funding, I make up for in passion and drive.