Floodgates

Floodgates explores the quiet resilience it takes to become your own advocate and the physical and the emotional are inextricably intertwined, and when we get to know our bodies, we also get to know our inner emotional world.

In making this project, I wanted our audience and the camera to feel like a loving observer to Elise while she goes through this personal moment and private condition. It felt important that our camera was somewhat voyeuristic but that we weren’t imparting shame onto Elise. My vision was to stay small- almost like reading a book where you’re inside the character’s head. I wanted to include nature as a metaphor for feelings and for our own bodies’ functioning. We open the film with scenes of running water. We all have water running through us; and ultimately, Elise’s main issue is that her water isn’t flowing. She’s stuck. She’s stuck literally with her peeing, but she’s also stuck metaphorically in her life.

When I put together our cast and crew, I knew I wanted folks who would treat this issue with respect and care. Our cast deeply understood the story and felt connected to Elise’s struggle based on their own experiences in the healthcare system. We worked as a team with our cinematographer and producer to make sure our main actress was comfortable in vulnerable positions on set– for example: she spends a big portion of the film on the toilet. Our core team was incredibly respectful, creative, and tender-hearted.

We also worked creatively to keep the story contained. We only had three locations and a very small crew. This contributed to the film feeling intimate. Our sound mixer even made sure to bring female boom operators to set, knowing the vulnerable position our main actress would be in. Just as it felt important to me to share this story, it felt equally important to me to curate a safe environment where this emotional story could come to life. Our whole team valued the experience of making the film as much as we valued the final product of the film.

Reliving my own pelvic floor PT experience through making Floodgates with a team of generous and supportive people around me who were not only affirmed for me that Elise’s story is worth creating and sharing, but also that my voice is important and impactful. Having the opportunity to turn this hard thing I went through into art was incredibly healing for me and I hope the film sheds light and sparks conversation on pelvic floor dysfunction.