Private Project

Everything in the past has life

In a culture that prizes male children to carry on the family name, many Chinese families under the One-Child Policy concealed having additional children. LGBTQIA+ artist and filmmaker Zhongkai Li was born in 1993, when China's family planning policies had been in force for nearly two decades. As the third child and only son to his family, he relates a story of his upbringing. Shortly before he left for college, his mother told him the secret story of his birth. Li asks how his family's life could have been different, and wonders how his fate and queer identity may yet be intertwined with his mother.

  • Zhongkai Li
    Director
  • Zhongkai Li
    Producer
  • John Lucas
    Executive Producer
  • Charles Musser
    Executive Producer
  • Michel Auder
    Mentor
  • Liyan Zhao
    Script Editor
  • Kyla Arsadjaja
    Poster Design
  • Project Type:
    Documentary, Experimental, Short, Student
  • Runtime:
    13 minutes 13 seconds
  • Completion Date:
    April 29, 2019
  • Production Budget:
    2,000 USD
  • Country of Origin:
    China
  • Country of Filming:
    China
  • Language:
    Chinese
  • Shooting Format:
    Digital
  • Aspect Ratio:
    16:9
  • Film Color:
    Color
  • First-time Filmmaker:
    Yes
  • Student Project:
    Yes
Director Biography - Zhongkai Li

Multi-disciplinary artist and filmmaker Zhongkai Li, currently living and working in New York City, blends a fascination with fine art, moving images, and history in his working practice. He was born under China’s one-child policy and grew up knowing that his very existence was technically illegal. He approaches time-based media by examining the different forms of interplay between narration, moving images, and sounds in physical and digital space. His cross-cultural experiences have shaped his perception, sharpening his abilities to observe contemporary collective behavior.

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Director Statement

One night before leaving for college, my mother told me the story of my birth. From then on, I have been rethinking my existence. How does one choose between one’s personal identity and one’s traditional values and responsibilities? Many members of the Chinese LGBTQ+ community need to face these questions. In juxtaposing these contradictions and generation gaps, the film encourages viewers to think about the meaning of family — no matter where they are or where they’re from.

Through my narration, I wish to guide the audience into a contemplative emotional experience between reality and appearance. The film shows many environmental scenes from my hometown: water, dense fog, haze, high-rise buildings. The past is interweaving with the present modernization of China. These contemporary urban landscapes inspire reflection on our increasingly vague global identity, as well as our complex geopolitical and personal connections.

We will eventually fade away in the torrent of the era. Who will decide our destiny? I want to dedicate this short film to people I love and to those who have not seen this world.