The Portland Hotel

The Portland hotel

A woman's trauma about the past stems from unsolved issues regarding loss and regret. Her heart is in the wrong place. Her internet modeling fame was short-lived. The Polaroid pictures are on fire. The memories are now a photographic hell. The void of the outside world ignites her pursuit of escapism. The Portland Hotel is a safe haven. She turns to cigarettes to recapture her youth. She is stuck in a TV of her own making; an invisible smoke box. Nothing is ever known fully. Her deep obsession with herself, takes a toll. She has smashed the narcissistic mirror and the pieces are crumbling and fading. She is now vulnerable. She begins to unravel. She is unstable - fragile, numb and cold. The pain is so severe, she represses it. Her emotions are turned off. She longs to learn from it and move on. She wants to become something of worth in this lifetime, and to progress. The new life haunts her as she spirals in a karmic loop. Within this sphere of TV flicker- light, her aspirations of becoming a screen legend are born. She moves beyond the waking world, and merges with the subconscious. The clairvoyant dreams now float to the surface and pierce the imaginary Earth. Swimming in a bathtub with strobe lights, time seems to stop. Her actions are in suspended animation. She haunts her own self. She processes her existential blues with this hotel room. Her inner eye and intuition are open. Her consciousness expands. Dreaming is free like the song. She seeks a release and for rare moment in this time, finds peace.

Andre Kaufman