Script File

Warehouser

JEFF WAREHOUSER is a genuinely good and likable guy. But he has issues. One being his crude, alcoholic Army Vet boss who berates him incessantly.

The complex of twelve warehouses is populated by a wonderfully odd assortment of good-hearted, cross cultural characters, all operating one kind of homespun businesses or another. The thing that bonds them is they all mutually love smoking weed.

Between the put-downs and demeaning odd tasks Jeff spends the bulk of his day interacting with his new warehouse family; drooling over the lithe ans sexy, but all too untouchable lesbian Motor Cross rider; and smoking glory-blows with his good buddy, an eccentric American Oriental cat who repairs golf equipment and relaxes by hitting his balls off the roof at distant passing cars.

In a second act set piece Jeff’s boss dies in a hilarious yet tasteful manner. Now unemployed, tossed from his home by the bank, Jeff sneaks into the boss’s warehouse to camp out. Thought to be porn stars, the East Indian guy and his Filipino Stripper girlfriend from across the way bust in on him welding guns, which they really suck at. Turns out they’re FBI agents working undercover. Lighting up a government grown, they tell Jeff their whole top secret story.

Influenced by weed and need, Jeff starts turning the warehouse into a home. He discovers a trapdoor under the bosses beer refrigerator, and discovers down below several crates filled with old hundred dollar bills.

The following morning he finds a beautiful nude young woman taking a shower under a hose hanging down from the roof. She’s the very liberal estranged daughter of the boss, now executor of his will.

They connect and make high octane love; his first, definitely not hers. He takes her down and shows her the money. But she doesn’t want it. She has a full life and is about to marry a successful, wealthy man back home. Jeff can keep it, and stay there as long as he wants.

Jeff starts an Ice Cream business. As he’s washing his new truck, the Motor Cycle nymph comes to him looking all lovely and ladylike in a sexy dress and sporting a new feminine hairdo. She confesses that she never was a dyke, her transvestite brothers suggestion to ward off the insults and advances of the guys at the track.

Now the owner of the complex, Jeff tells all his friends that they can hold their unit at no cost for life, and they all prosper for it. They throw a no expense spared block-style party at the completely renovated complex that gets kind of wild. Everyone’s getting high-high-high and having a balls out time of their lives. All, that is, except for the successful Jeff Warehouser and his beautiful new and pregnant bride, who are soberly sitting on top of their very own brand new world.

  • Project Type:
    Screenplay
  • Number of Pages:
    117
  • Country of Origin:
    United States
  • Language:
    English
  • First-time Screenwriter:
    No
  • Student Project:
    No
Writer Biography

--- Though I am one who has survived the torments of youth, a captive of insane and abusive parents; though I overcame in excess of two decades of crushing depression, my thoughts plagued near daily with the want to die, I transcended through strength of will and want of life to become a man who labored at giving hope, aid and shelter to the indigent, homeless and addicted out of my own home and resources, for near on three decades.
---- For seven years I was neighbor to and worked for two of Christendoms most famous touring singer song writers, and studied live sound reinforcement during that season. For the preceding eleven years I earned my income as an Independent, Contract Property Claims Adjuster, handling storm related claim throughout the nation. In 2006, the year I quit the business to pursue a career as a Writer/Director, I grossed $118,000.00 in 60 days and was on tract towards a quarter mill annually. But, money matters withstanding, my work in, my passionate hunger for art and music has been at the epicenter of my life spanning over five decades. Multiple this nucleus of my soul with my experience at the age of fourteen, when I made a Stop Motion/Live Actor film enjoyed by kids and adults alike. From that experience I became possessed with the desire to put forth poignant stories through this apex of all art forms.

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Writer Statement

A life engaged, in whatever the manner, at improving the quality of life for the suffering, is a life well spent.